a story from my youth

Less is more. Short is better than long. It’s more wise, and more appealing to read. This is my short blog.

A story from my youth

When I was younger, a child in the ways of the the Lord and an adolescent in my age, I became incredibly zealous for the Lord. I sought after him with the greatest love, as if He was truly worth looking for, someone deserving of my time, my thoughts and my whole life. I had no dignity. I would do anything for him.

When I was a little older, I phased out of this sick passion for the Lord. It was for practical reasons… my friends loathed me, my reputation became much more important as a result of my occupation, I grew up and out of my “youthful zeal.” Some of these things were actually good natured. My friends urged me on for good reasons (I had become full of myself), my reputation was used for the benefit of others… But following these things led to my greatest demis, I cursed the things I built saying, “My life is nothing more than youthful zeal devoid of reality, full of selfishness and elitist pride.” The loss became too big for me to deal with so I turned to the ways of mediocre Christian living -just enough to get by and be safe…

And now that I am oldest, I am fully aware of the truth. I traded the love of the Lord for an abomination to Him. But how great is his love toward us and how perfect at restoring us. For the Lord wants a broken and contrite heart -that’s all He requires to restore us and desires of us.

My love for the Lord was good regardless of my immaturity. He reminds me of how it moved His heart -He was overjoyed at my weak love. Yes! Utterly heartfelt -moved and ravished by it! (doesn’t that rattle your brain?) He was far more concerned with my love for him than my maturity. Afterall, He is the one who matures.

Now let me find that love again! As far as I’m concerned, maturity can come naturally, and if it never comes (how I perceive or anyone else perceives) so be it. I’ve found the thing worth living for: I will follow Jesus with all of my heart, soul, mind and strength.

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